California Fire Chief is a Milk and Beer Hero
California Fire Chief – Big Brian ‘Beer’ Fennessy. He might have found the other best use for beer aside drinking it. We drink it, we smash it, we vomit it but has anyone actually ever done anything heroic with it? As Peter Dante’s ‘Murph’ from Mr. Deeds perfectly puts, “Hehahehah yeahhh, beer!” It’s God barley-given gift to us as degenerate human beings, and I couldn’t be more grateful. In the same vein, he might have actually found the best use for milk aside from dumping it on a friend or pouring it down the drain. You’re either born with strong bones or you sit when you pee. Milk isn’t doing anything, so cut that out. Can’t be out here with a belly full of milk. Crazy.
Brian Fennessy was out in Altadena doing his job when he decided he should go and check on his brother. Luckily, they had already evacuated, but Brian decided he should go check on the house anyways. While passing the smoldering remains of the surrounding houses, he found his brother’s house, and their neighbor’s house, untouched. After seeing the gas meter in the back catching fire, he raided his brother’s fridge and found “some milk and a couple beers,” as Brian puts it. The rest right there is history.
Milk and beer for the Nobel Peace Prize
Udderly incredible. I’ve come back around on milk after seeing the heroic purposes it truly could serve. If there was a news crew on site, this is how it would go – “I figured if milk does a body good, it might do a burning house even better,” explained Fennessy, while casually sipping on one of the remaining beers. “And the beer? Well, that’s just to add a bit of flavor.” – Then he would demolish the rest of the beer and hum it into an existing house on fire. He’s a hero, a milkman, and a chiller all in one. Calcium fears him and ABV loathes him. He puts the DIY in dairy, and we should all strive to be more like Brian “Beer” Fennessy.
** Featured Photo Above is AI Generated **